My New Page Has Turned

Life is simple, exciting, positive, and awesome as of now.  I finally found myself and I couldnt be any happier.  Everything has fallen into place perfectly for me.  I honestly dont think I've ever been this much in love, this secure with myself and this happy about life.  I guess it goes to show everything happens for a reason. Although I wish it (the breakup) didnt happen the way it did, it has still given me the best gift yet. Not many people are lucky enough to fall in love with their best friend, and for them to love them back that much more. He makes me feel like I can do anything, and makes me feel so beautiful without even saying anything.. ok enough about all of that. I'm sure I'm making everyone naucious with all of my happiness.  It really does feel great though! I will have to say this though, the distance thing is killing me. 3 hours away is torture, I saw him this past weekend and it was nothing but amazing. Hopefully I will get to see him for awhile saturday but I'm not sure yet.  So my mom's friends from New Orleans are in town but I've been crazy busy and havent really gotten to spend much time with them.  I've also been really stressed about school. I'm supposed to graduate this december depending on how I do with my last two classes. But one of those is Algebra which I SUCK at. So I've been working really hard but still not getting the results I would like. It's all ok though....Chris always makes me feel so much better about it and has offered to help countless times, he wants nothing more than to see me succeed :) Needless to say...I'm the luckiest girl in the world <3 XOXO

Thing I miss

Yes breaking up with Tyler was hard and it always takes time to heal. But I have to say the one thing I miss the most is Logan. Seeing pictures of everyone always stings a little bit but seeing a picture of logan is what brings a tear almost every time.  I watched her grow for nearly three years and had a great bond with her. With all of her birthdays, her recitals, christmas, easter.... its just the hardest thing. Of course I always get attached to children, its always hard for me saying goodbye to them. Just yesterday one of my little daycare girls cried when I had to leave for work and yes I cried on the way out.... I just can't wait until I have my own. I know I'm young and all of that but I feel that there is so much more to life. I'm past partying and having a "good time" I dont go out much anyways, probably the same amount I would if I had a child anyways.  It's just like a piece of me hasn't been filled yet and it sucks. I know I need to wait, but its like I pretty much already have my life started. I'm 22, fixing to graduate college, have a great job and a great home.  I'm ready to go! haha.  I wouldn't even mind being a single parent, although I do think a child needs a father in there life, I never had one and I'm just fine. Plus I have my p paw, uncle bob, uncle barry and the whole crew to fill that void if I ever did end up being a single parent. The point is that I miss that little girl, it breaks my heart that she's going to grow up and not remember me. Hopefully one day I will have one of my own soon...can't wait to have my little Emma Riley in my arms :) XOXO

Oh Mondays

First off I would like to say that I definately can't party like I use too. I was a zombie all day at work and what sucked even worse is I was busy as heck & my online Algebra class started today. Needless to say it's 8:00 and I'm already in bed :) but I'm still studying for my child guidance test that i have tomorrow :/ so ALOT happened this weekend some good and some bad. I would get into detail... But I don't want to lol. I guess just certain things that happen seem to open your eyes. You know what I REALLY hate?! When grown people can't act like adults.... It's a never ending phenominon I swear. Anyways now that's off my chest lol. My head has been a little "off" lately and it's kind of hard to explain. As much as fun as Califonia was what I really want is to be at a resort all alone with no one except a bar tender. Just stick me in a hammock on the beach for a couple of weeks :) I really did look up vacation prices today at work but realized it's
almost winter :( dang the cold weather! So anyways this weekend was eventful, like I said good and bad but I can say that I learned alot about myself so that's always a good thing :) oops! gotta go fold laundry. XOXO

Home sweet home

California was nothing but amazing but was also long & expensive. On a
personal note I am still going through some personal stuff but I know
I will make it through. Just wish some things could of gone
differently but I guess that's the way it's supposed to be right? Need
to say alot more but im tired, sick, and it's late. Love ya'll XOXO

It's late

I could write 20 pages about how amazing this past weekend was but it
late & getting no sleep all weekend has caught up with me. Anyways I
can honestly say I haven't smiled and laughed as much as I did this
weekend literally in years. It's amazing how one person can make you
feel like a whole new better you. He's amazing, and he's been my best
friend for over 5 years, and I've never felt luckier. He does nothing
but lift me up and make me feel like a better person. I use to be
crazy jealous, insecure, question everything, hold back, and
complicate everything but it's like I said, I'm a whole new person & I
don't know how he does it.... I mean he works with mentally challenged
people every day.... How much more amazing and respectable can a
person be than that? Anyways I love him & his family. They have always
been close to me, his mom even argued that I was more her and daddys
friend than chris's lol. Sitting around a fire with them singing to a
solo guitar, looking at the stars while I'm getting sang to and not to
minchin my feet rubbed... Ha ya, try not to get too jealous. I could
go on and on but I honestly am falling asleep & he's txting me so I
gotta go :) XOXO